GE to Clifford Allbutt, London, 30 December 1868
Title
GE to Clifford Allbutt, London, 30 December 1868
Title
GE to Clifford Allbutt, London, 30 December 1868
Sender
George Eliot
Recipient
Clifford Allbutt
Date(s)
- 1868-12-30
Place
London
Letter Content
GE to Clifford Allbutt, London, 30 December 1868
MS: Fitzwilliam Museum, Cambridge. Envelope: T. Clifford Allbut Esq. M.D. | 38 Park Square | Leeds. Postmarks: LONDON-N.W | 5 | DE 30 | 68; B | LEEDS | 31 DE 68. Hitherto unpublished.
The Priory, | 21. North Bank, | Regents Park.
December 30. 1868.
My dear Dr. Allbut
In one sense those whom I have once known and admired are always with me; but it is an additional satisfaction to be assured now and then that they have a bodily as well as a spiritual presence. I confess to a little disappointment that you were hurried away from us too soon for me to have a quiet t'eate-'e0-t'eate with you, for there are things which one likes to say much better than to write.
My keen sympathy with your present suspense makes me long that you should share my reliance on those old, old truths which shallow, drawing-room talk contemptuously dismisses as "common-places," though they have more marrow in them, and are quite as seldom wrought into the mental habits as any of the subtleties that pretend to novelty. Never to beat and bruise one's wings against the inevitable but to throw the whole force of one's soul towards the achievement of some possible better, is the brief heading that need never be changed, however often the chapter of more special rules may have to be re-written. I use that summary every day, and could not live without repeating it to myself. For even with the most perfect love to cheer one, there is still a past which widens more and more in the consciousness as a wasted good, and there is the visibly narrowing future. All the devices which men have used under the name of consoling truths, to get rid of this need for absolute resignation, are in my deep conviction false and enfeebling. But I know through the experience of more than two thirds of my life the immense difficulty, to a passionate nature, of attaining more than a fitful exercise of such resignation, and especially I know (what you hint at) the blighting effect on the sympathies of an unsatisfied yearning for a supreme engrossing affection. So if I seem austere, please to interpret that seeming as the result of an unwilling conclusion that a human lot in which there is much direct personal enjoyment must at present be very rare.
But why do I write in this dismal way, when all the while I am cherishing hopes for you in cozy corners of my mind? Perhaps I am giving way to depression at the sight of so many drunken people this
Christmas, or the state of the barometer makes me match the weather in dreariness. Never mind -- if you get a great happiness my lead will seem light as a feather to you, and if not, you will like me the better for not belonging to the "genial" crew, who see so much good in human misery that it (the misery) makes them quite comfortable.
Mr. Lewes thanks you for the correction of your erratum, and is one with me in responding to your warm good wishes. For your own sake I am glad you are not in London, but for his sake I should count your being within frequent reach a considerable additional charm to our London life.
When you come again -- and remember, you have held out that pleasant prospect -- do pray help me to think of the chromo-lithograph which lies ready for you 852 as it did when you were here, but which is not worth the packing and sending by rail. I am utterly unfit to undertake practical services for my fellow-men. I remember nothing, and detest doing anything. After knowing this truth about my character, you will conclude that I must be a valuable counsellor. At least, count this in my favour, that I shall always be
Your sincere friend
M. E. Lewes.
Dr. Clifford Allbut.
MS: Fitzwilliam Museum, Cambridge. Envelope: T. Clifford Allbut Esq. M.D. | 38 Park Square | Leeds. Postmarks: LONDON-N.W | 5 | DE 30 | 68; B | LEEDS | 31 DE 68. Hitherto unpublished.
The Priory, | 21. North Bank, | Regents Park.
December 30. 1868.
My dear Dr. Allbut
In one sense those whom I have once known and admired are always with me; but it is an additional satisfaction to be assured now and then that they have a bodily as well as a spiritual presence. I confess to a little disappointment that you were hurried away from us too soon for me to have a quiet t'eate-'e0-t'eate with you, for there are things which one likes to say much better than to write.
My keen sympathy with your present suspense makes me long that you should share my reliance on those old, old truths which shallow, drawing-room talk contemptuously dismisses as "common-places," though they have more marrow in them, and are quite as seldom wrought into the mental habits as any of the subtleties that pretend to novelty. Never to beat and bruise one's wings against the inevitable but to throw the whole force of one's soul towards the achievement of some possible better, is the brief heading that need never be changed, however often the chapter of more special rules may have to be re-written. I use that summary every day, and could not live without repeating it to myself. For even with the most perfect love to cheer one, there is still a past which widens more and more in the consciousness as a wasted good, and there is the visibly narrowing future. All the devices which men have used under the name of consoling truths, to get rid of this need for absolute resignation, are in my deep conviction false and enfeebling. But I know through the experience of more than two thirds of my life the immense difficulty, to a passionate nature, of attaining more than a fitful exercise of such resignation, and especially I know (what you hint at) the blighting effect on the sympathies of an unsatisfied yearning for a supreme engrossing affection. So if I seem austere, please to interpret that seeming as the result of an unwilling conclusion that a human lot in which there is much direct personal enjoyment must at present be very rare.
But why do I write in this dismal way, when all the while I am cherishing hopes for you in cozy corners of my mind? Perhaps I am giving way to depression at the sight of so many drunken people this
Christmas, or the state of the barometer makes me match the weather in dreariness. Never mind -- if you get a great happiness my lead will seem light as a feather to you, and if not, you will like me the better for not belonging to the "genial" crew, who see so much good in human misery that it (the misery) makes them quite comfortable.
Mr. Lewes thanks you for the correction of your erratum, and is one with me in responding to your warm good wishes. For your own sake I am glad you are not in London, but for his sake I should count your being within frequent reach a considerable additional charm to our London life.
When you come again -- and remember, you have held out that pleasant prospect -- do pray help me to think of the chromo-lithograph which lies ready for you 852 as it did when you were here, but which is not worth the packing and sending by rail. I am utterly unfit to undertake practical services for my fellow-men. I remember nothing, and detest doing anything. After knowing this truth about my character, you will conclude that I must be a valuable counsellor. At least, count this in my favour, that I shall always be
Your sincere friend
M. E. Lewes.
Dr. Clifford Allbut.
Signature
M. E. Lewes.
Citation
George Eliot, GE to Clifford Allbutt, London, 30 December 1868, Complete George Eliot Letters(2026), George Eliot Archive, edited by Beverley Park Rilett. https://GeorgeEliotArchive.org, Accessed September 7, 2026. https://georgeeliotarchive.org/items/show/92263