GE to Francis Watts, Foleshill, 3 August [1842]
Title
GE to Francis Watts, Foleshill, 3 August [1842]
Title
GE to Francis Watts, Foleshill, 3 August [1842]
Sender
George Eliot
Recipient
Francis Watts
Date(s)
- 1842-08-03
Place
FOLESHILL
Letter Content
GE to Francis Watts, Foleshill, 3 August [1842]
Text: Typewritten copy, National Library of Scotland. Hitherto unpublished.
Foleshill, August 3rd.
Revd and dear Sir,
If I have been able to realize your plan of progress you are now at home and I hope so far breathing from your toils in this working-day world as to warrant my intrusion on you.
I do not really as a habit retain loans so long as I have done these books of yours so pray do not set down my present dilatoriness as an item of your judgment of my practical character. I hope that your health is so benefitted by change of scene and occupation, as to fit you for your projected journey and exertions. I dare say you are well acquainted with the lovely lochs and mountains which I have only seen with the mind's eye, and I can imagine no one would drink delight from beautiful scenery with better appreciation than yourself, because you have the soul's calm sunshine and the heartfelt joy as your constant companions, along with a quick perception of the lovely and the grand.
If I must talk of myself I can only tell you that I am in much the same mental condition as Henry IV when he said of the opposite pleaders "Il me semble que tous les deux ont raison." I can just now grasp nothing as truth but the principle that that which is best in ethics is the only means of subjective happiness, that perfect love and purity must be the goal of my race, that only while reaching after them I can feel myself in harmony with the tendencies of creation. You implied a wish to know whether my pursuit of truth were prayerful, and I cannot feel quite honest in passing by your half question without notice. My convictions as to the nature of the Deity are so held in equilibrio by the appearance of things in my glimmering apprehension that prayer, beyond that involved in culture, would be in my idea (though possibly I am quite wrong) a vain offering. I confess to you that I feel it an inexpressible relief to be freed from the apprehension of what Finney 439 well describes, that at each moment I tread on chords that will vibrate for weal or woe to all eternity. I could shed tears of joy to believe that in this lovely world I may lie on the grass and ruminate on possibilities without dreading lest my conclusions should be everlastingly fatal. It seems to me that the awful anticipations entailed by a reception of all the dogmas in the New Testament operate unfavourably on moral beauty by disturbing that spontaneity, that choice of the good for its own sake, that answers my ideal.
You will say I am a naughty girl but you have a simple and hasty expression of some of my feelings, which if wrong and of injurious effect, will I hope be rectified. Pray pardon my freedom and all else that needs pardon and believe me, Revd and dear Sir,
Yours with grateful respect,
Mary Ann Evans.
Text: Typewritten copy, National Library of Scotland. Hitherto unpublished.
Foleshill, August 3rd.
Revd and dear Sir,
If I have been able to realize your plan of progress you are now at home and I hope so far breathing from your toils in this working-day world as to warrant my intrusion on you.
I do not really as a habit retain loans so long as I have done these books of yours so pray do not set down my present dilatoriness as an item of your judgment of my practical character. I hope that your health is so benefitted by change of scene and occupation, as to fit you for your projected journey and exertions. I dare say you are well acquainted with the lovely lochs and mountains which I have only seen with the mind's eye, and I can imagine no one would drink delight from beautiful scenery with better appreciation than yourself, because you have the soul's calm sunshine and the heartfelt joy as your constant companions, along with a quick perception of the lovely and the grand.
If I must talk of myself I can only tell you that I am in much the same mental condition as Henry IV when he said of the opposite pleaders "Il me semble que tous les deux ont raison." I can just now grasp nothing as truth but the principle that that which is best in ethics is the only means of subjective happiness, that perfect love and purity must be the goal of my race, that only while reaching after them I can feel myself in harmony with the tendencies of creation. You implied a wish to know whether my pursuit of truth were prayerful, and I cannot feel quite honest in passing by your half question without notice. My convictions as to the nature of the Deity are so held in equilibrio by the appearance of things in my glimmering apprehension that prayer, beyond that involved in culture, would be in my idea (though possibly I am quite wrong) a vain offering. I confess to you that I feel it an inexpressible relief to be freed from the apprehension of what Finney 439 well describes, that at each moment I tread on chords that will vibrate for weal or woe to all eternity. I could shed tears of joy to believe that in this lovely world I may lie on the grass and ruminate on possibilities without dreading lest my conclusions should be everlastingly fatal. It seems to me that the awful anticipations entailed by a reception of all the dogmas in the New Testament operate unfavourably on moral beauty by disturbing that spontaneity, that choice of the good for its own sake, that answers my ideal.
You will say I am a naughty girl but you have a simple and hasty expression of some of my feelings, which if wrong and of injurious effect, will I hope be rectified. Pray pardon my freedom and all else that needs pardon and believe me, Revd and dear Sir,
Yours with grateful respect,
Mary Ann Evans.
Signature
Mary Ann Evans.
Citation
George Eliot, GE to Francis Watts, Foleshill, 3 August [1842], Complete George Eliot Letters(2026), George Eliot Archive, edited by Beverley Park Rilett. https://GeorgeEliotArchive.org, Accessed September 7, 2026. https://georgeeliotarchive.org/items/show/92335